Challenge Yourself!

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HERE I COME WITH MY THREE MONTH UPDATE! September marked the beginning of the school year and the first time I taught 2 different classes, Digital Sketch & Draw and Digital Arts. One is a middle school class and the other is an upper school class. At this very moment grades and comments are due so those have been taking up a good amount of time. Two classes have been a lot to juggle but I have been able to organize myself through... 3 different planners and calendars. Some might think that's overkill but it honestly has been the only way I have been able to keep up with everything. 

October was eventful because it was our second wedding anniversary! We had a lovely night and actually celebrated twice. Once at our favorite greek restaurant and the second time on the anniversary of when we started dating which was a couple of days later. Korean bbq and laughs were had~ Every year we say that we won't draw something for each other but we always manage a little something. 

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Life has been very good to us. We both are working hard and focusing on the future. I have been planning a lot of stuff for my own work and trying to draw more regularly. Would you believe that after my previous post I stopped drawing as much? I started focusing more on my double workload and the beginning of the school year. If everything goes according to plan, there are a lot of changes coming within the next couple of years to our curriculum and our department and I'm taking a nice lead on that which I am very excited about! So I am still working to find a nice balance of my professional and personal life. I have been finding inspiration in Freelance artists on Youtube. I have also been stocking up on some of my favorite artists' merchandise from Etsy or their own stores. I have a pile in my art room that I need to photograph before I rip into them! At first I was going to film it (you know, trying to get back into my own Youtube channel!) but I would like to focus my filming more on my own work rather than that of others. Which is going to be difficult because I don't like filming myself while I draw... so I'm going to have to figure something out. 

How about you? How is everything going? Do you still read here?! Please tell me of any lovely things going on in your own life!

Self Journey

As always, it has been a while! I am happy to say that I have actually been sticking to drawing regularly more than I have in the past couple of years, and it has been really great for me. I have been practicing watercolor and getting more serious about learning new techniques and figuring out my style with it. I would like to create another blogpost entirely on this subject, so I'll try to keep it brief. As I tend to do, I mix many brands and just go with the flow. The top image is my latest piece that I did a couple of days ago. I have been inspired by artists like Alisa Vysochina and Leigh Ellexson. Their work is so beautiful and they are such lovely people. It has been a struggle getting back on that horse, but I finally feel like I'm getting somewhere with my art. There's a lot I could write on this subject, maybe one day I will. I feel happy with my work and I'm excited to continue! I have been updating my Instagram and my Tumblr regularly with my art, I guess it's mostly because they're the easiest to update with! I had left both abandoned for a while and I'm actually posting there again, so please have a look! I am currently figuring out a way to take better photos of my work to post them up <3

Along with traditional media, I have been practicing my digital art skills with my iPad Pro. This is something new I'm trying to teach myself as well. I try to draw every day with either medium to get some practice in. I'm learning a lot about myself in the process! By not concentrating so much on developing a style, I have found myself developing one. Last year I feel like I concentrated very hard on that and while I was drawing regularly, I felt like my work felt a bit alien to me. This year has been more about exploration and risks. 

I had to decide to renew my Squarespace. I felt sad knowing that I don't update as much as I used to and maybe I should stop trying to make this happen. To be honest with you, I'm not exactly sure what "this" is. I have started really thinking about what it is I'm trying to accomplish here. So many wonderful artists online have dreams about becoming freelancers, animators, Illustrators, etc. and I think to myself, what is it that I am actually trying to accomplish? I have been reading Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and it is helping me find some peace about this entire thought process. I have selfish reasons for continuing to draw. I don't want to become an animator and I have drawn for other people in the past in terms of books, projects and web design. It was all fun and I wonder if I'll ever have enough time to take on more projects like those, but I enjoy drawing for myself and displaying my work. I like writing about my work and my process. Now I have to decide if this website is worth keeping. I love my space. I designed it from scratch. I made all the graphics, organized everything and love having it on display. I use it as a sort of portfolio, as well. I'm still figuring out who I am, what I like and what I need in order to be happy. So I'm going to continue on this journey! I want to regularly update and work on so many more things and share it all on here. I'm planning many things, so please stay tuned!

Miss you when you're gone

Hello everyone! I figured I could write on here since it has been a while. What you see above is a picture I was planning on putting up as a "10 Things About Me" for Youtube but I look at it now and I'm like "uh, no." So I want to make something new before I upload that video. I wanted to put it up last week but I figured I would rather put up something I'm really proud of instead of just getting up there as fast as possible. I can do better, so I will.

How has everyone been? I have been making it a mission of mine to draw every single day, even if it's a sketch. It has been going well, but I'm trying to move forward from sketches and have more full-color sketches instead, if not an actual illustration. I guess it has been proving to be difficult with the limited time I have been having. I'm also trying to mix what I do so it's not just in my sketchbook. I have been enjoying working with my iPad Pro more often with sketches lately. Not that I'm posting anywhere, really. Except I'm trying to do it here more often.

House organizing has been a main priority for me! Josh and I are working hard to make the house fit right for both of us and it has been a great way to get my mind off of things. We have a yard now and we have to figure things out like... plants and gardening and stuff. ADULT THINGS? Well, yeah. One of my personal projects has been my office. I think the layout and what's in there changes every month, but that's because I'm trying to figure it out! I have brought over my artwork boxes from previous years and it is such a pleasure having them in my room ;-; I have dreamed of having them with me and open and available for me to go through whenever I want. I haven't really had that since I lived at my family home. When I need some inspiration I like to leaf through the boxes and find some old artwork. I have been doing that a bit more, lately. I found some real gems!

A personal project I have been trying to accomplish is to wear more clothes that I'm comfortable with. I know I have mentioned it on here before, but it's still a work in progress. As much as I love makeup, I love going makeup free and feeling more comfortable with myself. 

Daily life has been going. Josh and I make our time together an adventure and we like to mix up fun and responsibilities as much as we can. The other day we went into the city and decided to just go exploring. We haven't done that in a long time, and we had a lot of fun. We had macarons, went to art stores and splurged a bit. We tried the unicorn frap (I didn't like it, he was ok with it)! 

We have also been cleaning out his grandma's house and have been finding some real treasures from a long time ago. We found journals from the early 1900's and some penmanship to aspire to. We were fortunate enough to grab some furniture from her house to put in our own. Our house has furniture that has been passed down in my family and now some furniture from his grandma, including a model ship his grandpa made. We haven't been there a year yet but it really does feel like our home more and more. 

I keep this blog for fun, and to have a place to put my art. The feeling of "not being good enough" is starting to loom over me and I admit it has been a bit difficult to get through it. Going through my old artwork didn't exactly help. I really love what I did previous years. I can see how much I loved drawing and didn't care about putting it up or showing anyone besides my friends. I have had some really inspiring friends that always kept me going and gave me so much support over the years. Seeing what I created is inspiring but also a little overwhelming. I can't draw nearly as much now but whenever I do draw I just feel like it will never be up to par with my expectations. I know, I know, me and every artist in the world. I'm just feeling down about it, lately. I have some work from my friends mixed in with my own in those art boxes and seeing what they created at the same age gives me that same conflicting feeling. Inspired, but down. I can't help compare myself to others because I want my art to be just as good! I want to be just as successful! I have to keep going, I guess. 

The other thing I used to do so much of was write. I have binders worth of my writing since 2003. Like I mean, thick bunches of paper with every college ruled line filled. I never could have imagined back then that I would find these stories again at my age and read them with a red face. 

I was proud of myself, and I still am. Those boxes are filled with pure love. Love for what I did, love for my characters and love for my fandoms (CHEEEEEESY)! I want to be like that again. I'm so happy I saved everything the way I did. I have math and science notes from when I started high school filled with doodles and sketches and I remember what went through my head back then. It's crazy that I'm now teaching students that age about art and how to draw! It was like seeing little Deanna through a window and what a terrible student she was, haha!

I don't know if many people read my blog. I'm grateful is you do. Thank you for taking the time to read my thoughts. I don't typically get this personal and introspective in entries. I guess these thoughts are nagging at me and I'm unsure of what to do with them. Just keep going, going.

Little My Chatter Wednesday

I feel like my blog is becoming a place where I just update about my life and I guess I'm ok with that. I've been trying to venture into other platforms with my artwork and my blog has always been a mix of professional and "update" stuff, so here you go. Last week was Valentine's Day! Josh and I decided to actually make something for each other as our main gift for the first time because we wanted to see how it would go and I think it went really well!

I had been planning out my gift for him since the middle of January and the idea evolved a lot before I finally settled on something. I originally wanted to create a little booklet from a deck of cards filled with reasons why I love him. I saw the idea on Youtube and thought it was super cute! I wanted to put my own flair to it and from there it evolved into what I actually made for him. Instead of the deck of cards, I got blank cardstock and drew 14 thank you cards for him. I just wanted to get a blank pink deck of cards but I just couldn't find one I liked! Then I wanted to actually draw a little something on them and couldn't do it on glossy cards anyway so... I went with this. I love experimenting with my style when it comes to making gifts for Josh so I tried a couple of new things. I took a more simple approach and tried to make each card look like something someone would get for a loved one from the store. I think some came out better than others Λ†Λ†; Each card is decorated with Washi tape and has a custom note to him on the back. I wrapped them all together with some string and included some candy hearts <3 I try to make something better for him than the last time and I'm really proud of this one! 

Josh really surprised me this year... After we said we wouldn't buy any gifts for each other, he still got me 36 roses delivered to my job and Godiva chocolate covered strawberries ;-; Along with a handmade card, he gave me a heart shaped container in a little Valentine's bag. I was like... what in the world could this be??? When I opened it I was still very confused. Then it all hit me at once. 

Lately I have been transfixed on slime videos on Instagram. I love watching the squish and the different types of slime people make. I honestly can't even explain it. I even like watching it be made! But I didn't try to hide this fact from Josh and he thought it was so weird! When I ordered some slime from Etsy to see if I would like it, he was even more perplexed and openly grossed out by the slime. He would make fun of me for it! So when I opened this little heart shaped container and inside was the red glittered slime that smelled like roses, I think tears came to my eyes and I involuntarily started laughing so hard that I couldn't breathe. He was like "I DON'T KNOW IF YOU LIKE IT OR YOU HATE IT PLEASE TELL ME." I am so touched that he ventured so far as to create slime for me himself, especially one so perfect! I love it so much <3 We went to dinner with me still laughing in the car.

I have been trying my hardest to update my Sketchbook on here! I have been drawing more and trying some new things out and I'm really liking it! I have a drawing planned for my next video but I actually gotta... do it. But yeah, drawing has been going great. I'm leaning to enjoy it again just because and not because I need to post something somewhere. 

Right now I am in the middle of reading (listening to) Sophie Kinsella's new book "My Not So Perfect Life" and I am really enjoying it! It's one of those books that you enjoy getting cozy with and relish in the tiny details. She's one of my favorite authors so I got the book as soon as it was released. Other than that, I have been enjoying watching Baylee Jae and Taylor R's vlogs on Youtube <3 What have you been up to lately?

Little My Chatter

I have been enjoying sitting down and drawing as much as I can, lately. I think I said this in a previous post, but I just like saying it out loud. I didn't realize how long it has been since I really produced something I loved that was just for myself. I usually draw sketches for myself and if I'm drawing like a birthday picture or something for someone I have to give it away to them. It definitely helps that I've been restocking my art supplies since purging a couple of weeks ago. That's not to say my art drawer isn't any less bursting at the seams... but that just means I need more storage space! 

I have been trying to expand outside of simple sketching or trying out art supplies. I've been taking a lot of baby steps. I will always be astounded at how much time I dedicated to drawing when I was in school. Now that I'm ADULTING it's much harder, but I'm making it more of a priority this year (9*_*)9 So far so good! I have really been enjoying working with watercolors and mixing media. I recently drew Nao again and compared her to a drawing I did about six months ago and the difference is pretty staggering. It gives me hope T-T Onwards to creating more art!

Personal life wise, everything has been going swimingly. Josh and I had grown accustomed to staying in all weekend while living in the apartment and we want to change that! To be fair, we did that because we felt bad for leaving Hershel most of the day at home by himself, but the puppy-parent guilt has waned a bit and now we feel more comfortable going to a movie or getting dinner after work and having mini day trips every once in a while over the weekend. They have been really lovely! We certainly eat better food. Our favorite trip to take is to Mitsuwa which is about an hour away from us. We go there for food and shopping~ On our most recent trip I found a variety of sizes of the Pen-Tec pen I've been loving recently so it was an awesome find. We also made a trip to this store that was jam packed with Gundam and a few other figures. I found this Sonico figure and was instantly like NEED. But... I have no display case to put her in and I would be terrified of keeping her on my desk T-T Please Lord don't let me get back into figure collecting, I can't do that AND pine for luxury bags T-T It doesn't help that Josh has been actively starting his figure collecting career. BAH! 

I hope you have been having a wonderful week so far!